This real-life story was shared with one of our local Global Care operations.
“My name is Amanda*. I’m married with three kids.
My husband and I grew up in Christian homes and met through church. We have travelled and lived in many different places, attending a lot of churches. In doing that, we have seen some awesome stuff but also witnessed some horrors and with that and COVID, we stepped away from church and from God.
My husband is a builder and had a venture that didn’t work out, which put us in massive debt. He became severely depressed and started drinking. I took a full-time job to help ease the financial load, but it wasn’t enough to pull my husband out of his depression fog. I spent the best part of a year wondering if today was the day I would get a call to say he had killed himself and would pray God would bring him back each night. With no family here, working full time, trying to be both mum and dad for my kids and keep my husband alive. Never have I felt so alone. I couldn’t tell anyone how bad he was (he had asked me not to), so I was trying to act like everything was fine.
He hit rock bottom, with suicide on his mind every minute of every day, drinking to try to escape that and the feeling of failure.
Some friends invited us to church as they had something special on. While we were there, a speaker talked about an alcoholic recovery program they were about to start. My husband signed up that day, quit drinking that day, found a counsellor that week, and said to God, ‘well, this is it. Either do something and help me out of this mess, or I’m done.’ God did.
Over several weeks of the recovery program and counselling, and no longer drinking, he started to get better.
I, however, still felt so alone. Why did I have to go through all that? Why did I have to be the strong one? That week we decided to try out church again… During the service, I felt God tell me He was going to show me His love; he was going to pour out his love on me like I have never known.
We went home and went about our week. My husband had had a very slow month of work, and we couldn’t pay bills. He had come so far with the counsellor, eight months sober, but I knew we couldn’t afford to keep paying for counselling, let alone the other bills. But again, I felt God telling me to keep him going there as he still really needed it. That is when I discovered the local foodcare (Global Care). I met Christy*, who saw me with tears in my eyes, filled me up, and sent me on my way, saying, ‘Please come back next week!’ I was too proud to admit defeat, but there I was, humbled and helped.
I did go back, and after a particularly bad week with more financial strain, wondering how I would pay for my child’s specialist appointments, I was met by Rebecca*, who filled my car to overflowing far beyond my requests. ‘Hey Mumma’, she would say, loading my car up.
I drove away that day, pulled over and broke down (emotionally). All I could hear was God saying over and over, ‘I told you I would pour my love out on you. You are not alone. I am here, and I love you.’
It is a humbling thing to have to ask for help. I’m not good at it at all. It’s really, really hard, especially for a proud person like myself. Often I think there are many more people so much more deserving than I, but this is why I wanted to tell my story. Although I can’t give anything back for what I have received, but I can share my experience.
I appreciate that it’s a hand up, not a hand out too! And I can still have dignity in paying for what I can afford.
Foodcare for my family means:
So, from the absolute bottom of my heart, thank you for all you do. I will be forever grateful (especially for Rebecca and Christy, who showed me love and light in dark times).”
*Names have been changed to protect privacy.
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